I made a mistake. About in September I was a friends place and we were cooking together I had strong feelings for her for a long time I thought she was amazing and I don't know why I did it but I kept putting my hand on her shoulder when we were talking I didn't even realise I was doing it till I left , she spoke to me about it after she said she wasent upset about it and I did apologise and she did forgive me and we have spoken a few times sence but I feel so guilty about it like I've done something far worse then what I did and I've been struggling to live with it sence then I know nothing bad is gonna happen so I'm not worried about it and I've used it as motivation to better myself but I still feel like a monster I'm not trying to play some victim no what I did was wrong but it's in the past and I've learnt from so why do I still feel so guilty about it

I am guilty of a past affair.

I regret my decisions. My major, as lucrative as it was, took my college days. Now it's past me and I can't do shit

Continuation.. due to her past experiences of cheating she feels like I deserve it all. So I have to suffer all the consequences of what I've done. And now every move I do she have to know about it, All of my socmed account is now deleted or deactivated I don't do any of those now for 1 whole year now and I can't also do the things I want to do. She still doesn't know of what I did in the past and right now believe me I'm trying to make it up for her however it's draining me. And I'm hoping that one day it will be okay because right now my lingering feelings for my ex is almost fading however due to our situation I don't know if I will keep going or put an end to this and focus on my family and myself. I really think that everything that is happening is because of the sins I've made. And I'm thinking what if I didn't do that then I imagine me and my ex if we're still together being super happy. And I know it's wrong. The reason why I'm writing this is to say I'M SORRY FOR EVERYTHING